|
|
 #2 (permalink) Thu Nov 23, 2017 5:29 am Re: kicked started |
|
|
I have two questions and a suggestion:
1. Doesn't '2002' indicate that Moses was 11 when his parents were killed, and now he is 26? (No anachronism)
2. Could the second sentence imply that the 26-year-old was another son?
Suggestion: The 26-year-old was playing football in the streets WHERE his parents lost their lives.
_________________
Anglophile
I know only one thing - that is that I know nothing. |
|
 Anglophile
I'm a Communicator ;-)
Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Posts: 4922
Location: India
|
|
| #3 (permalink) Thu Nov 23, 2017 9:20 am Re: kicked started |
|
|
| Anglophile wrote: |
2. Could the second sentence imply that the 26-year-old was another son?
|
No, the family doesn’t have another son who is 26.
I was actually wondering about that part: “The 26-year-old was playing football … when his parents lost their lives.”—do you agree with the wording? (Sounds like the 26-year-old was doing sth when sth else happened in 2002.) Hence my question whether the phrase “The 26-year-old was playing football in the streets when…” is flawless or it can be misinterpreted. |
|
Eugene2114
I'm a Communicator ;-)
Joined: 22 Dec 2010
Posts: 2998
|
 |
| #4 (permalink) Thu Nov 23, 2017 9:38 am Re: kicked started |
|
|
You could examine my suggestion wherein WHEN was changed into WHERE.
That's the only possibility I find in the absence of the original text with me.
_________________
Anglophile
I know only one thing - that is that I know nothing. |
|
Anglophile
I'm a Communicator ;-)
Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Posts: 4922
Location: India
|
|
| #5 (permalink) Thu Nov 23, 2017 10:02 am Re: kicked started |
|
|
| Anglophile wrote: | You could examine my suggestion wherein WHEN was changed into WHERE.
|
You can read it following the link: http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/42060348
To me “The 26-year-old was playing football in the streets WHERE his parents lost their lives” would sound even murkier as it removes the time factor (when) altogether.
(The article was written by a Nigerian which prompted me to ask for a second opinion.) |
|
Eugene2114
I'm a Communicator ;-)
Joined: 22 Dec 2010
Posts: 2998
|
|
| #6 (permalink) Fri Nov 24, 2017 4:05 am Re: kicked started |
|
|
| Quote: | | “Now 26, he was playing…” would be stylistically better for me. |
Yes, I agree.
I think 'The now 26-year-old Moses was playing ....' OR 'Moses, now 26, was playing ....' may also become suitable.
_________________
Anglophile
I know only one thing - that is that I know nothing. |
|
Anglophile
I'm a Communicator ;-)
Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Posts: 4922
Location: India
|
|
|
| welcome along | Use of the definite article with the name of bridges |
